The Evening Tide ...

The Evening Tide is a work in progress leading to a short novel - I will here serialise it and see where it goes ... Today, I thought, I will talk, its simple, no, it's difficult, we live some distance apart. I was little, I grew up, very quickly, there was hardly room to breath, she was there, furnishing me with her special love, then, she was gone. I don't have time, really, to know whether I love her or not. It's just therapy, I talk about her, she grows on me a little, then she's gone. Life is what I'm living she says, that's me, out there, part of the everyday scrum that you call having a nice time and that I'm dealing with, that's the difference. When she is with him, for example, and this is just me, talking, I'm the last person on her 'to do' list, must call what's her name, she would be upset if she thought that's how I thought, that's how she comes across, I'm afraid. We are so different. The thing is he is always there, like moss attached to a tree. What kind of love is that, is it actually love or is it a fey kind of obsession on either part. Do they make love or do they do something else, the kind of thing that makes them forget all about love, that little four letter word that cannot be mistaken for the three letter word, but which they delude themselves about. They went for a motorcycle ride the other day, she told me after the thrilling event. She put her helmet on, or he may have put it on for her, I don'know which. She said she put her arms around his waist, that she needed to breath, that quick kind of rush you feel only when going at speed, when your breath is almost sucked out of you by the elements, and, so, she says, all her cares, besides being employed in keeping her seat, and trying to negotiate between the two elements, you, can there be such a bargain, and anyway, what is breath and what is air, and so, after about half an hour or so of motorcycling she was seriously in pain. She would stop talking to me if she knew the thoughts that went on in my head, and especially where he, the demigod is concerned. I don't like him very much, for good reason, however, she would start to wonder whether I had acquired a nervous disposition to all things male and that she is merely the casualty in my sights. That's not true, but, we would have to trade thoughts, maybe even words, so I would rather not go there. Overall, she could have a point, he does get in the way quite a bit, he's not prepared to take a back seat, even if it means his relationship is under discussion, and I can barely see that point. It's just, we''re a family, and well, we need some quality time together, and three's a crowd. I don't like the thought of leaving anyone out, and she is the same, one of the nicest things about her, she's human, you know, nice, anything else just would not do. I feel a little responsible for this situation, without me these thoughts would not exist, my words would have less meaning, but, ce la vie ... the truth must out.